Change is not always the best solution. Lao Tzu, the Taoist author of the Tao Te Ching was an advocate of non-action. However, he also encourages careful and intentional action with the phrase “Cautious, like crossing a river in the winter.” - Lao Tzu, the Tao Te Ching. Stability is good up to a point. It’s a great thing to enjoy the sense of familiarity, continuity and simplicity that stability can provide. And, change can be hard for anyone. So much could potentially happen that you weren't counting on. Yet, there is a time when change is a critical component to moving forward, getting to the next stage, or simply accepting life on life’s terms. But, how can we tell that change is the missing catalyst to our own evolution, the all important next step for us to take in our lives?
What signals change?
There are several common signals for the need to change including restlessness, angst, and cognitive dissonance, the experience of feeling like you are trying to put a square peg in a round hole. Cognitive dissonance is at play when our behavior does not match our beliefs, principles or values.
Despite our state of readiness, change is inevitable. This happens both in our world and inside of ourselves. Unlike machines, we are constantly changing as we replace our entire body's cells. We are also gradually maturing physically and emotionally and as we grow our values, beliefs and principles move with us. Usually the last part to move is our behavior. For many people the signal for change is a sense that old ways or conditions do not seem to fit anymore. For others, it is simply that they are growing weary of the routine that produces predictably insufficient results in their lives and businesses.
Who am I when it comes to change?
Another factor to consider is that we don’t all respond to change in the same way. Some people readily embrace and instigate change. They are change agents, whose life may be characterized on one hand as dynamic, immediate, as well as unstoppable and on the other as unfocused, chaotic, and unpredictable. This behavior is reflected by the phrase “Ready, GO!”
Others have a tendency to be adverse to change and avoid it all together. Their favorite phrase might be, “Ready, set, set, set, set…(and so on.) ” This behavior reflects a possible state of “analysis paralysis.” It may look like procrastination, but it is probably fear, fear of change. This often ends with a hopeful claim that sounds a little like, "someday change will come, someday"... But, the word "someday" can really be just a euphemism for - "It will never, ever happen!" Knowing who we are when it comes to change is a important key. In attempting to understanding who we are when it comes to change, some find it helpful to reflect on the following questions:
- Do I naturally resist change?
- Do I just go with the flow?
- Do I frequently create change for the sake of change?
Many people find it useful to reflect on change as it has happened in their past. Sitting with questions like: "What was the biggest change when I was a child?" and "How did I deal with it?" as well as "What other major changes have occurred throughout my life?" and "What was my behavior, my natural tendency in those cases?"
Meditation can be a useful tool for reflecting on these questions and thereby increasing self-awareness. We become more self-aware when we can sit in the quiet to consider what is happening internally. We can authentically ask ourselves: “Am I avoiding change because that’s what I always do?” Or, “Am I jumping headlong into change because I am bored or I want to distract myself from higher priority activities, activities that could make me feel uncomfortable.” This process is a very personal journey and reinforces the importance of self-awareness through deep reflection. Trusting that answers will arise from your authentic self in quiet, meditative mindfulness can be both powerful and fruitful.
Discipline and Courage
Once we are clear on our path of action or non-action, then discipline and courage can be instrumental in taking that course. Especially if the action is counter to our nature and involves activities that are outside of our comfort zone.
Personal Power
As individuals, we have the power to create positive change or maintain much needed stability. The choice for possible, internal change is always our own. When we welcome and heed the intuitive voice of our authentic self as our guide, change becomes not only manageable, but also powerfully transformational.
Perhaps the biggest tragedy of our lives is that freedom is possible, yet we can pass our years trapped in the same old patterns.
- Tara Brach
